Happy Birthday To ME!

Yep, it's MY turn. My birthday isn't really until tomorrow, but I have to write things down as I think of them, or they'll 'poof' from my brain...

I'm 52. Never had a problem with revealing my age. It's only a number. Well, maybe not....SOME days I wake up and feel about 90! The body just isn't 18 anymore, and never lets me forget that fact! LOL....give me an hour out of bed and I'm as good as...well...a 52-year-old!

There's not much to tell about me really. Born in the Pacific Northwest (near Portland, OR), the 6th of 7 children. Moved to Ramona at age 5, where I've been ever since. Met & married Jim here, raised my kids here...I guess it's all about Ramona, huh? :)

I was the proverbial 'goody-two-shoes'. My mom, being a single mom of 7, HAD to be strict, and it just wasn't worth it to 'screw up'. So many good childhood memories in Ramona. Back then, in the mid 60's, the population here was around 5,000. You knew just about everyone you met on the street. Two tiny grocery stores, and you knew the owners....and their kids too! Walks with mama down Main Street at 9 o'oclock on a warm summer evening. Kid brother David checking each pay phone as we passed by, hoping for success in finding a shiny coin. That kid was lucky! Sleeping with doors and windows WIDE open on a hot summer night. No fear of crime-this town was safe! ONE Sheriff. He knew everyone, and everyone knew him. Great guy! Playing in the middle of the street, with no fear of being run down by a 'speeder'.....long bike rides on summer days, just David and me, all over Ramona. Mom wasn't worried. We were safe. Playing on the school grounds was fun, especially the ball courts. They're gone now. Trick or Treating-ALONE, and again, no fear of harm. You knew everyone who's house you went to. Ice cream cones at the Jolly Cone-a friend was the owner. Mananas is there now. A special treat was dinner at the Ranch Drive-In...El Ranchita is there now. SO many memories. How I LOVE yesteryear, when life was so simple, innocent, and uncomplicated. I'd go back in a heartbeat, just to relive the wonderful times.

I married Jim just shy of my 17th birthday. That was 'acceptable' back then-wasn't unusual at all. At the time, there were those who gave us MAYBE 5 years. It's been 35. Guess we showed them, huh? I was blessed to be a stay-at-home-mom. Shannon was in 2nd grade before I got my first job. It was perfect. The kids were in school from 8-2, and my job was from 9-1. Eventually, of course, each child grew up and left 'home', but there was usually a family member to take their place in the empty bedroom, and on occasion, each child has moved back 'home' for a period. Our last 'chick' to leave the 'nest', was my niece Julie, 2 years ago. She lived with us briefly until she met & married her hubby Jeremy. It took some getting used to, this 'empty nest'. I've loved having everyone here, but now I'm used to it.

The past few years have been a season of discovering who PENNY is. Now, what I'm about to say is true, but in NO way am I speaking regretfully. I wouldn't change what I've done. See, when I got married, and had my kids, I kind of put MY wants and needs on the back burner. I kind of lost sight as to who I was, and what MY purpose in life is. I've always been very family-oriented. Family has ALWAYS come first, no matter what. Jim & I had SO much fun being involved with our kids. Sports, music, whatever, we always did things as a family. I instilled in my children that your family comes above all others, and I am proud to say that they took heart, and that's exactly how things are.

But now....it's just Jim & me. As I reflect on the past 52 years, I have to ask myself, 'what have I accomplished, and where do I go from here?' Well, in answer to question #1....there are 3+answers: Jimmy, Brian, & Shannon, their spouses and their children. This is by far my greatest accomplishment. If I accomplish nothing else in this life, I can die today knowing that some of the most wonderful human beings on this earth share my DNA, and that I was blessed by their births.

I have found my role in life it seems. The role of servant hood-and I mean that in the most respectful way. I care for people. My calling came a LONG time ago-about 30 years ago to be exact, when I started caring for my ailing mom. Out of 7 siblings, I was the only one left in Ramona, so I just did what I had to do, and didn't think twice about it. I've cared for others as well, and there's no greater satisfaction than knowing you helped make someone final years happy and easier. And loved.

So, here I am. 52. A 'Golden Girl'. Still wondering who I really am, and what it is that my heart desires. I guess I really needn't worry about WHO I am, or what I want. I am a child of God, and He will help me along the path of self discovery. I am a work in progress. I think I'll just sit back, enjoy the 'ride of life', and take each day as it comes.

So, that's it. Just a small portion of my story. I hope you've enjoyed reading it as much as I've enjoyed reliving it. Maybe I should write a book, hmmm???

Until next time~God Bless~

Happy Birthday Brian!

Due to family emergencies and illnesses, this blog is late.

My son Brian turned 31 on Tuesday. Let me tell you, in THIS mom's words, about Brian.

We almost didn't have him. He wasn't breathing when he was born. I never heard his first cry, nor did I see him until he was about 5 hours old. Talk about a freaked out mama! So freaked out that I got out of bed without permission, and told Jim if HE didn't take me to the nursery RIGHT NOW, I'd go by myself. So we went, and as we walked through the nursery doors, I passed out. Too soon after giving birth to be out of bed, but my baby boy needed me, and come hell or high water I was going to be with him! He'd swallowed amniotic fluid just before he crowned, and his lungs were full, and infection set in. He was in NICU for 2 weeks. There's nothing harder than leaving the hospital with empty arms.

I also had a 3 year old at home. Jimmy was so excited about having a baby brother, and so crushed when we came home without Brian. He literally sobbed, which, of course, made mommy join right in. It was tough. Spend the mornings with Jimmy, then head down to Mercy Hosp. and spend 4 or 5 hours with Brian, then head home in time to fix dinner and spend some quality time with Jimmy before he went to bed. We were exhausted, but the glorious homecoming day finally arrived, and we brought our precious son home!

Brian was a very mellow and good-natured baby. But boy, could that kid EAT! Wow! I always said I felt sorry for the women who married my sons, because their grocery bills would be astronomical! LOL...I think they've finally tapered off. No matter, I don't have to feed them anymore! LOL...Brian also liked to stick things where they don't belong. First time was a rock up his nostril. The dang thing was bigger than his nostril, and even the Dr couldn't figure out how he got it up there! The 2nd time was about 2 months later. A candy corn in his ear-that one was a false alarm, but we didn't know that until the ER visit, at which time the nurse asked me, 'Hey, isn't that the little guy that shoved a rock up his nose a couple of months ago?'...um...yeah.

Brian, at 22 months old, ran away from home. Not consciously, mind you. More like wandered away. I turned my back for 30 seconds (which was about 29 seconds too long) and poof-GONE. My mother lived up the street, so all I could think of was that since we'd walked the street dozens of times, maybe he headed up that way. I stuck 5 year old Jimmy in the doorway of our apt. with the instructions, 'if you see Brian, you grab him and drag him in here and do NOT let him out!'...there is no greater pain than not knowing where your baby is.....horrible, awful thoughts ran through my head: 'he's so little, there's NO way a car could see him over the hood! We're 1 block from Main Street! Oh dear God, PLEASE help me find my baby NOW!!!' I RAN (and for those of you who really know me, you know that I do NOT run) up towards mom's house. No Brian. Headed back for home to call the Sheriff, when something made me turn my head towards the fire station, which was then on 9th Street, and lo and behold, here comes our friend Bill-a firefighter-headed my way, with a smiling, tow-headed little boy named Brian-happily on his hip! I didn't know whether to hug him or beat him! I chose the former...LOL...I should've known then that that would be Brian's calling in life.

Fast forward 16 years or so. Brian is 18, and invites mom to lunch. While sitting there, he says, 'Mom, I believe God has called me to be a firefighter.' It was then that I handed Brian over to God and said, 'Lord, if you've called Brian to this career, I place him in Your hands, and I trust YOU to take care of him.' And He has. Brian's been in some pretty hairy situations, and yet, I don't fear for him, because I know he is safely in the palm of the Lord's Hand.

Brian has always been so good with kids. Always wanted kids. His dream was realized when he met and married Katie, and then just 16 months ago became a proud daddy to Peyton Marie.
To watch my son with his child is amazing. He's such a good daddy. Loving, patient, attentive. He's what good daddies are made of. He's what good husbands are made of. he's what good sons are made of.

I am so blessed to have the 2 best sons in the world. Brian, like his big brother Jimmy, cares deeply about his parents and siblings, and his closest friends. He's always there with a helping hand, a word of advice, and a hug of encouragement. I am beyond proud to call him my son.

Happy Birthday Brian. I love you.
Mom